Two girls possessed a letter which one of my colleagues got a hold of. He brought the letter to our office, read it aloud to us as we all laughed in mockery. In the letter, the girls friend, fourteen years old, apologized to a boy for not being worthy enough for him. She was sorry that she doesn’t wear makeup and that she’s not perfect, yet the overarching theme was the yearning of being loved by the boy. She’s only 14! She reminded me of my childhood years when all I knew was to run behind boys and beg for their love. She reminded me also, of my late teens and early twenties when I sought the love of men through indecent behavior. Feeling void of love can cause us to do crazy things, for not only is this girl and I seeking love but the masses out there. I’m certain it would come as a shock to many that God is also seeking love, our love.
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.”- Mark 12:30
The Bible states that men and women have been created in God’s image. John and Stasi Eldredge describe this phenomenon in an interesting way in one of their books, CAPTIVITING. They stated that being created in the image of God, both male and female reveal the mystery of God’s image. Since the men are bigger built, they portray the strength, power, and protectiveness of God. In contrast women portray the vulnerability of God in seeking love; in being warm and inviting, in being care takers, and in showing wrath and jealousy over their lover. It is stated in Exodus 20:3-5 that God said to His people that “They should have no other gods before him. They should not make for themselves idols in the form of anything. They should not bow down to them or worship them, because He is a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers of those who hate Him, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love Him and keep His commandments.”
Wouldn’t you agree that the same aspect described above reveals aspects of the female character? Women tend to get jealous when they feel that their partners are giving someone priority over them. Some reveal fury and wrath when they become second best to their lover. However, when most women are loved accordingly they cultivate the love. They extend mercy and grace towards their imperfect lover. They go all out and invest much in the love they’re in.
When I was in a relationship earlier this year, most of the time I was not receiving the love and affirmation I needed from a lover. The time I was supposed to feel more loved was the time I felt more alone, insecure, and unhappy. Fortunately, by the help of the Holy Spirit I learned to seek the love I so desired in spending time with God. In those early mornings, I began to experience contentment, validation, and strength from the Lord even when I wasn’t getting it elsewhere. I also learned that He delighted in hearing me express my love for Him. The same love I needed was the same love He wanted from me. In abiding in pure, reciprocal love, the early mornings in prayer which I continue to this day became a symphony.
The love that fourteen-year old girl is seeking can only be founding in abiding in the love of Christ. Only His love can fill the void of insecurity, invalidation, and discontentment we experience. He desires to lavish love into our weary and broken hearts but we don’t care to make time for Him. We are busy scrolling through our television channels all day; busy scrolling through our phones…we place other things and people (gods) as a priority to Him. We make time to seek love by writing letters, offering our bodies, and sacrificing our time and energy in people or things that mock our need for love.
The result of abiding in Christ’s love is phenomenal! It is seen in the character of an individual. The shame and weaknesses have been removed and is now clothed in strength and dignity. In His love our foolishness is being covered by an outpouring of heavenly wisdom. Oh, let’s talk of that remarkable beauty!? The stench of sin is removed by His love as He rubs of His remarkable beauty on us. Nothing could ever replace the value of abiding in the love of Christ!
Abiding in the love of Christ enables us to have a place in society. We are not cast off. We are not damned. We are given another chance, we are strengthened. We discover that some of our acts of rebellion and disobedience to God’s word stem from the throbbing need for intimacy. And the Spirit of God teaches us that intimacy can be found in the indescribable and unending love of Jesus. We learn that we don’t need to beg for affection when we can freely attain it in His presence. He teaches us true love. Love for self and love for Him. He allows us to experience something great- that only he alone satisfies, and “in ALL things we become more than conquerors through Christ who loves us!”(Romans8:37)
One thing that the enemy of our souls tries to disconnect s from is the love of God. We can get caught up in many things but when we miss Gods love we miss the essentials of the Christian life. When we experience His love we know how to respect and honor Him, we learn how to value ourselves and the gift of salvation HE has given us. We learn not to just give into the desires of the flesh. We learn that not abiding in His love will cost us our peace and contentment. The love of Christ changes and makes a great difference in us, it completes us, so it is essential that we never cease from abiding in it. Instead of begging people to love us, to see our worth, and to validate us, let us pursue Him.