Choose Your Friends Wisely!

I felt so uncomfortable in the cab on our way from the dinner function! My sisters friends were loud, drunk and rowdy, swearing and I just felt out of place! It actually made me cringe to see how I different I was from them! I used to wonder why I don’t really “click” with them even before re-dedicating my life to Jesus but now I know, I was born to be different!  I was born to respect God and acknowledge His existence!

Like with my relationship with men I tried finding great friendship in the past, hopping from one group of friends to another! I was just looking for somebody who was more like me, somebody who could show me what really friendship was all about! The last time I experienced good friends was way back in boarding school were everyone was just equal! We all slept on the same beds, all had the same food, studied mostly at the same time! There was no competition whatsoever and nobody was trying to be better than anybody because we were all the same! Our friendship was made out of laughter, sharing jokes, dreaming about the future together, singing worship and praise songs to Jesus…and all those wonderful things that teenagers do! It was only when I came out of high school to the “big, bad world” that I discovered that friendship is a gift from God and if you have it, treasure it! I only had people now who called themselves friends but were ought to hurt me, advising me to sleep with men for money, stealing things from me even though I would gladly give, friends who’d smile with me today and gossip about me the next moment? 

I spent my late teens and early adulthood looking for someone who could be like my high school buddies, somebody who was true and sincere! People take advantage of you now and only realise later that you are not what they thought you were, and you have to forgive but always remember who was there for you when nobody else was! Some of the friends I made vanished because we just didn’t have the same values, beliefs and behaviour! I could sit in a crowd of people drinking, swearing, smoking weed and still felt uncomfortable! Some of the friendships were so dull that we had to drink alcohol to be comfortable around each other! Some were so unnecessary that we had to speak negative and bring ourselves down in order for us to laugh! Some friendships were so boring that we had to gossip about others to entertain ourselves! All this “fun” was for a little moment and the effects would last forever! If I drink today and get driven by alcohol like I used to and find myself involved in mischievous things, I know I would have the same friend talking about me behind my back the following day, hence the effects that last forever! You know those friends who delight in seeing you fall, making mistakes, and reaping the consequence of your mistakes! If you want true friendship you will find it in Jesus, people will bring you down but He will remain true to who He is! (There is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.Proverbs18:24)

When I re-dedicated my life to Jesus I was a bit sad that I wouldn’t be able to hang out with these people anymore but it was for the best, God deliberately took me out! As I went to church Sunday after Sunday, I was finally recognized by a certain lady who later on introduced me to the most amazing ladies in life! As I spent time with them, praying and evangelizing, I finally grasped the full idea of what friendship was all about! Find friends who pray for you, friends who won’t talk bad about the church or the pastor or members of the church! Find friends who love you so much that they will reprove you when you do wrong and not broadcast it to the world! In these ladies presence I can be myself, I can go crazy without even having to sip on alcohol simply because we are all pursuing the same gaol, we are all madly in love with Jesus! Any relationship that prays together will stand together even in friendship! 

I would rather be in the company of people who go to church, read their bibles and pray at all times! 

I can dream big with these ladies and have my vision boards and I know I won’t be laughed at because they are also pursuing the same dreams! I can scream and shout for my Jesus and not be embarrassed because I know that they understand this love! When the love of Jesus has got you, you won’t be able to keep it to yourself so you share it with the friends around you, by giving your time, prayers, kind words and gifts! We are all leaders and are all goal orientated, nobody bullies anybody or try to dictate or makes another one feel inferior because we all understand we are a work in progress and God is using us as a strong South African women who will change the world for Him!