Yesterday I believe that I said TWO things that really offended God. I was on my way back from campus, walking behind a guy. I admired his walk and thought to myself how it turns me on. To my surprise the guy slowed down a little bit and I continued walking fast because I wasn’t really thinking that he would approach me and start a conversation. But he did and he walked me half way, and we had a really nice chat. When he turned away he lit a cigarette and I knew right then that oh well, he can’t be the guy I want to marry. Feeling so discouraged and weary, because of exams and things just not falling into place, I said, "I wish I wasn’t born again, I would do what I want to do right now!" What an awkward moment, because I knew what I had just said was just childish and irrelevant really. I continued to walk home and when I got home my friend asked me if I had gotten the job I applied for. And there was another stressor! My exams aren’t really going well. I am not getting the job I want, I don’t have this, I don’t have that! I said to him, "I just wish God could answer me this once!" wow, i felt really bad for saying that too. How many times has God answered me and today I say that about him?
I watched TV with my housemates, laughing and talking too much, trying to run away from that "guilt" I was feeling. I just felt that it was okay for me to say those things because I'm just going through "a lot". When I went to bed, I had to come face to face with God! He's not scary though, He wasn’t angry; he just wanted to have something like a meeting with me! I prayed but I didn’t really feel the power that I always feel! Not even my favourite gospel song could get me "in the spirit." I wanted to shake, feel the heat, and feel the Spirit working in my life but none of that happened. Well, I said a prayer even though I didn’t feel the connection between Jesus and I, switched the lights off, and went to bed! I tossed and turned for about an hour in bed and I normally don’t have troubling sleeping. So I knew that God was involved in this. I got up and decided that I am going to seek His face until I'm able to fall asleep! And what a wondrous God He is!
At midnight, I began to pray! I prayed for quite a long time until God revealed a scripture for me to read. John chapter 4! There were some verses which really stood out which I will share with you! As I prayed I saw a big round tree, with lots of dark red fruit... So I opened my bible to John chapter 4 and it is a story about Jesus and the Samaritan woman. Please read through it for you to know more. So this is the first verse that struck me, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst again. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”
The Holy Spirit said to me, it is now time to receive the water that comes from God. You will never thirst again! You will never thirst for the things of the world again! You will never lust after a man again! You will never feel the desire to fornicate again! Because God is filling you with his living waters! You will never thirst again!
As I continued to read, the next verse that struck me is the following, 23 Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. 24 God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in the Spirit and in truth.”
You see, God doesn’t only want you to expect things from Him. Now that I'm born again, God must show his miracles in my life? No that is not the kind of attitude Christ wants you to have, but to be able to worship Him at all times. In the midst of your circumstances, don’t rely on your feelings, but in the Spirit of God!
I continued to pray because I want to hear more from Him! Minutes and minutes in prayer, changing positions, I saw that tree again. This time the red fruit in the tree had fallen down and the tree was becoming greener and firmer! As I continued to pray, I saw the red fruits on the ground being swept away until there was no more! With tears rolling down my eyes, the Holy Spirit said to me, Even though your sins are as red as scarlet there will be white as snow! Jesus is removing everything in you that does not align with God's word! God is sweeping away all your pain, all your sins, all those fruit in you that were making you rot inside and he was wiping away all the bad things that came in my life because of those fruit! God has rooted you in His foundation! You have experienced so much pain and misfortune, but God is reviving you again! You are like a tree planted by God himself and He will take care of you! Just trust in Him, even though your circumstances don’t allow you to!
As I prayed, the Spirit of God led me to Malachi chapter 3. In verse 11 and 12 the bible says,
“And I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes,
So that he will not destroy the fruit of your ground,
Nor shall the vine fail to bear fruit for you in the field,”
Says the Lord of hosts;
12 “And all nations will call you blessed,
For you will be a delightful land,”
Says the Lord of hosts.
Wow, I was in awe of what God was showing me. He said you are like a tree, and I will take care of you! If you learn to trust in me with no doubt, I will rebuke the devourer for your sake! Do you understand what that means? God will fight your battles for you! God will restore you again! God will make you fruitful! You will grow before His eyes and He himself will nurture and water you until you are a firm tree!
I continued to pray and God revealed the last scripture for the night! It was 02:30AM! Isaiah 40 from verse 6! The voice said, “Cry out!”
And he said, “What shall I cry?”
“All flesh is grass,
And all its loveliness is like the flower of the field.
7 The grass withers, the flower fades,
Because the breath of the Lord blows upon it;
Surely the people are grass.
8 The grass withers, the flower fades,
But the word of our God stands forever.”
I was so amazed at how real God is! You are like a tree, planted by God Himself! God wants to make you beautiful and strong! Even if the winds blow, even when seasons change, God wants you to be unshakable! Everything fades, but if you are in His plan, and you become ONE with His word, you will be like a tree standing firm forever!
Please don’t rush God to do things that you want in your life, sometimes just set time aside to seek Him , and listen to what He has to tell you! Sometimes we are so busy trying to do things our own way, we are so busy in the noise of this world, but God wants you to just switch off that loud music and listen to what He has for you! I am telling you, when you seek God, you will find him! I love you my sweet Jesus! Thank you for your mighty revelation!