My spirit grieved yesterday during my evening prayer.With a broken heart and hot tears running down my cheeks, I prayed for all the women out there who are in need of God's touch. Women who have forgotten how it feels like to be loved and appreciated, woman who have lost their confidence and worth! Women who are in need of sexual deliverance and are striving for purity. I pray for such women because not so long ago, I was such a woman. The problem with us is that when we sin or fail to do something right, we run away from God. The further we run away from Him, the more sin we commit and give Satan the free will to trap us in his little circle of destruction. I have done so many terrible things friends, things that I wont mention for now. The further I ran away from God, the more the loneliness, the more the depression, the more the sadness and the more sin I committed. And one day, I was tired of living like that, and ran back to God. Listen, when all else fail, go back to God! His goal for you is abundant life. His bond is love. He will never turn you back. His yoke is easy and his burden is light! As I was praying, the holy spirit was saying to me, "His burden is light, His yoke is easy!" I did not quite understand, but I guess God wanted me to write about it.
I don't think much about my cousin and her brother, but as I prayed last night she came to my mind. And I guess that is why I was so grieved. My cousin and her brother were very spiritual years back. They worshipped and prayed together, they taught us, my sister and I, gospel songs. I did not know much back then because I was still a little kid but I remember today, how they used to pray and worship the Lord. As we grew older and the years went by, things changed and somehow, she drifted away from God's plan. I don't know what happened but through out the years, she has managed to have four kids, she is unemployed, she has been in and out of prison and she is now HIV positive. When we go back home, she begs us for money and it is such a predicament for all of us.Her brother on the hand, is happily married and living a blessed life. I don't think that this is what God had intended her life to be like? I don't think that God likes it when we make wrong decisions in our lives and push Him away afterwards. I don't think God enjoys seeing us begging people, living in poverty, in diseases, and adversity? The bible says in John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full! Alcohol has never solved anything! Jumping from relationship to relationship has never solved anything! Jesus has solved everything. He came that we may have life and life abundantly!
I don't know what would have happened to me if I hadn't come back to my Jesus. I can look myself in the mirror today and see a beautiful princess guided by God. When I disappointed my parents, I never disappointed God. When my enemies were laughing at me, God was never laughing at me. When I had given up on myself and thought I have no value whatsoever, God lifted me up!! "And I find myself here on my knees again, caught up in grace like an avalanche! Nothing compares to this love burning in my heart!" I love you my sweet King Jesus! You are my number one King!